No matter what they say, for men, 'Size does matter' and the point could be argued with anyone who disputes this. Size means strength, it means you can protect yourself. It means you are capable and able.

It sends a message saying 'don't mess with me'. It protects you. It can intimidate others. It gives you confidence and makes you feel and look good. So 'yeah', size means everything! So being 'big' is important. It does mean something. It communicates to the world without having to say a word that you mean business.

But what happens when you are not naturally 'big'? What if you have a small frame? Or are seemingly lithe? What if you find it difficult to build muscle? Does this mean you are relegated to feeling and looking weak? That you will feel unsafe and unprotected and not capable of looking after yourself? Does it mean you are stuck?

Many men go to great lengths to create the image of size or 'Bigness' in their bodies. Gym visits, protein powders, supplements and for some additional hormonal input is adopted. For many men do not feel comfortable with feeling small. For feeling 'small' can make you feel more vulnerable, more fragile and unsafe. It can also decrease your confidence in your ability to defend yourself. Psychologically, it can take its toll. So to avoid the feeling of perceived weakness the drive to be 'Big' takes over.

Where does the drive to be 'Big' then become something unhealthy? When does it become a goal that could hurt rather than provide the confidence to succeed? When would acceptance of self possibly work more favourably?

The drive to be 'Big' becomes 'unhealthy' when it takes a priority over all other life pursuits. When life outside of achieving this goal begins to suffer. For example when:

• Time at the gym causes neglect of other responsibilities such as in career and relationships.
• Behavior becomes aggressive, uncaring and unkind to others.
• Nothing else matters outside of gaining the 'size'. Then this is a problem.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to feel safe, secure and protected in your world and building up your body as a means to provide this reassurance is perfect. But keeping it in a healthy balance is the key.

So what steps can you take to help yourself keep your 'Big' goals in perspective to make sure your whole life thrives and expands as a result of your size increasing goal?

Firstly, keep in mind that no matter what size you are it doesn't mean anything about you as a person. It is the qualities you are as a person that count. You will gain more respect and honor from others by being a man of integrity, respect and honour yourself. Act from this place and other men will want to be part of your world.

Secondly, you can be strong, 'tough', capable and able of defending yourself even if you are not naturally physically 'Big'. It is more about centering and focusing your mind and using this wisely. The martial arts constantly attract lighter and leaner size men who have an amazing amount of strength and ability to defend and protect from a place of true power. Physical size is not the key, it is how you use your power that matters.

Thirdly, if you are using certain supplements or hormonal support systems that cause you to act unnaturally aggressive and cause distress to those around you it is best you seek some help to drop this dependency and find a way to reconcile your need to be 'Big' in healthier ways.

Being 'Big' is almost a natural drive for so many men because it means so much and gives men the confidence to succeed in life. By being willing to understand this and incorporating a plan that allows for growth physically without jeopardising life overall, being 'Big' can work well for you!

'Told you size matters!

About the Author

Joanne M. Prior is Director of Think Yourself… Successful. Joanne specializes in helping women and men to truly understand how to think and how to eat to achieve the greatest weight loss success they are capable of. Her background is B.Sc. (Nutrition), followed by Post. Grad Studies in Counselling followed by her Reiki Master accreditation. Joanne is the published author of Think Yourself Thin and I Can't Stop Eating - What do I do? E-Books and is a contributing writing for leading health and fitness nagazines in Australia and the UK. She is a sought-after speaker in the area of weight loss while running a successful private practice in Sydney. For further information about Joanne's work, please contact her at +61 (0) 412 499 758, or online at http://www.joanneprior.com or email to  This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .

TrackBack URI for this entry

Comments (0)

Subscribe to this comment's feed